Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Happy Dayzzz

Again, caught in the same trap of having to hurdle over anti-robot codes to log back into my Blogger account. After many failing attempts (and huffs and puffs and swear words) I started thinking I maybe really was a robot or an alien invader.  I even caught myself trying to pronounce and define the jumble words I was having to decipher.   ...I decided that a "loldren" was a large pot a witch uses to stir a bubbling and possibly steaming magic potion that makes people laugh out load. 

I also just realized that the phonetic, written laugh looks like, "Hannah."  Who is my best friend and also makes me laugh. 
Oh life is so sweet.

But anyway, I was trying to get back in the groove of blogging to report on all the fantastic and wonderful things that are going on in my life.  

First of all, the people next door finally moved into their big fancy, white house.  Which is strange because I can no long feel secure doing the dishes in the nude.  
But anyway, as any other given Wednesday afternoon, I sat on my comfy, red sectional conveniently situated facing the front window of my living room.  ...I like to gaze out this window as though it is a TV screen.  I give the squirrels voices, personalities, and plot lines. (Plus, this window watching ritual is an opportune time for me to catch up and bond with my main squeeze, Minnie.) 

Anyway, I decided it was pretty pathetic to have been spying out the window for the better part of an hour, so I decide to go do the dishes.   I'm elbow deep in soapy water when I glance over and catch  glimpse of myself in the reflection of my gone black screensaver sitting on the kitchen table.  Aaaannnd I looked JUST LIKE that 1940s "We Can Do It" womens propaganda poster.

Hahahaha.  Thennnn I return back to my window post up spot and see this!:

This is our cooky, Asian studies professor.  He brought over really stale oatmeal cookies and told us he'd be leaving for a month in South Korea.  I guess that was a month ago.  Wow does time fly.  Especially when you're having fun :D 

Stay posted for more happy moments in a day in the life of muah. 

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

So my amazingly thoughtful sister sent me this book the other day:

It's a checklist of simple and often unrecognized things one can be good at
And as I started reading it, I began realizing all the useless gifts I have.  Like finding four leaf clovers.  And doing good impressions of Blue's Clues and Miss Sormaz.  
And coaxing stray cats into letting me pet them. 

So I encourage all of you (you know, my 4 followers) to make a list of the things you are uniquely good at. Whether they're practical or not.  
All of our weird talents and interests make you your special, spunky self! 

Monday, April 16, 2012

Trouble Shooting...

I was quickly reminded why I had chosen to journal instead of blog for the past few months when I had to jump through a billion hoops to be able to log back onto this stinkin' blogger account:

Okay, seriously?  I have 20/20 vision and could not for the life of me decipher these non-sense jumble words.  

Which brings me to my next big point: 

Life is hard,
And sometimes confusing and frustrating,
And sometimes you don't see the point of things you have to do,
But if you patiently persist,
You'll eventually get where you're trying to go (even if you look like a fool squinting and whispering profanities at your computer screen-haha).

So anyway- Happy Monday from a born-again blogger! 
More life lessons to come- stay tuned!

Monday, November 14, 2011

Silver Linings In A Busy Day

Today at the Boys and Girls Club we had a tornado warning which meant we had to herd all the girls in the locker room.  And since we were limited on resources, I suggested a game called "go-in-the-bathroom-stall-and-change-something-about-your-appearance-and-then-we'll-guess-the-difference."

Seems harmless right?  I expected them to like, take their headband off or roll up a pant leg or something.

So Maddy goes first.  And she comes out looking the exact same as before.  Even my keen observation skills couldn't detect a slight difference.

So the girls guess and try to figure it out.  And then when we finally give up she yells, "I MADE MY UNDERWEAR INTO A THONG!"

Kids do the darndest things. 

Oh and then I met someone named Forrest Gilmore.  WHAT AN EFFING AWESOME NAME! 
Forrest Gump and Happy Gilmore are quite possibly the greatest feel good movies of all time.  Of all time! 

Saturday, November 12, 2011

11:11 on 11/11/11!!!!!!!!!!!

To celebrate 11:11, Kelly and I made an enormous fort in the living room.
And pretended that our fort was a carnival tent and we were just really big people on display at the miniature people circus.

Then we went down memory lane by sharing hilarious stories of our childhood. 

Some generations remember where they were when President Kennedy was assassinated, or when NASA put a man on the moon, or the bombing of Pearl Harbor.
For Kelly and me, we both seem to have a vivid and explicit memories of where and when we first learned the Macarena. 

Kelly learned from her brother's friend whom she had a crush on because he jumped out of the emergency exit of the school bus on the last day of 8th grade.  
I learned from my Aunt Sherry at my grandpa's house on the 4th of July.  I can even remember the scent of Off Deep Woods bug spray around the campfire. 
We also came to the conclusion that, if done right, the Macarena dance sequence can fit any song.

Try it!

Then today we had a little incident at the house I call "dump and dash."

I was taking an afternoon nap, minding my own business, when Alex barges into my room with something like: "Jill! Get up! Hurry! Like, it's an emergency! Come out in the living room. Oh my gosh.  Crisis! I don't know what to do. There's!.. I just!.. ohmygosh just come out here!!"

The thoughts going through my head at this point were beyond terrifying.  I was literally trying to process where my running shoes were in case I had to run away from a Cyclops with a small child in his mouth standing in the living room.

Instead I was greeted by a dripping ceiling..

.. with piss water.

So Alex continues to explain that the toilet was leaking really bad. 

In my sleepiness I suggest "Hey maybe you should just call Reza (our landlord)." [Mistake #1]
And she does. Then she tells me she has to leave for work.
In the mean time, I put some Brussels sprouts in the microwave for lunch. [Mistake #2]

Reza shows up within minutes of Alex's frantic call,  you know, now that our house officially smells like stinky feet and I'm the only one home. Awesome.

So I was left to answer the door and try to explain this dripping mess.
I gave Reza a short explanation that there seems to have been a malfunction with the toilet upstairs, but I didn't really know what was going on (mind you, I had not even gone upstairs to see the source yet), and I go to my room to try to avoid this awkward encounter. 

Then I hear Reza call me upstairs "Jilliannnnnnnnn"
So I go up there, and Reza, his wife, and I all crowd around a pee and poo filled toilet as he ask me questions about what happened.

Again, I reminded him that I do not share that bathroom and am unsure of the premise of the situation (however, if I had to guess, somebody probably took a poop and tried to flush too much toilet paper hence the overflowing toilet water on the floor and through the ceiling).

Then Reza and his wife starting talking in Indian or Hindu or Urdu or whatever code language they speak.

I decided this embarrassing encounter was going nowhere fast, so I apologized for the mess and returned to my bedroom.

Awkward and uncomfortable situation of the year... check.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Why Must They Make Flintstones Gummy Vitamins So Good?!

Today I've defined the cliché: "too much of a good thing can be bad."  Last night (or rather, very early this morning) in my studying rampage, I took a break to seek a tasty snack to revitalize my late night enthusiasm to finish a paper.  I opened my somewhat sparsely stocked cabinet, and all it it’s glory was a translucent red bottle of Flintstones Gummy Vitamins—next to a box of uncooked pasta and a cinnamon-sugar shaker. 

So obviously I opted for the gummies.

I guess I can’t say I hadn’t been warned.  About a week and a half ago my good friend Kelly fell into a similar vitamin trap, far exceeding the recommend daily amount, which resulted in funny colored poo.  

But it’s a bit of a dilemma. Flintstone’s Vitmans are so friggin’ good I can’t eat just one. Or two.

..Or five.  Yes I had close to ten of those tasty little Bedrock bastards.

I remember having to eat those chalky artificially flavored orange and grape Flintsontes vitamins as a kid; however the upgrade to gummies is simply monumental.  They are downright delicious.  It’s like eating candy that you don’t feel guilty about overindulging because, after all, they ARE vitamins.
But those little disguised gummy bears are now sitting in my colon making me hate my life.  The term “shit a brick” has never felt so close to home.

For today I guess I will continue to pee green, poo red, and toot in the wind.  My apologies innocent walkers to and fro on the Bloomington campus. 

Friday, October 21, 2011

Blogging is like bicycling...I can just hop back on. Right?

Blogging for me has become this ebb and flow of compulsive blogging rants followed by long periods of absence. I've been a busy bee, but I'm trying to get back onto the blogging train....SOOOOooOOOOoOo

Here's whats up:

I officially became an IU Campus Compact AmeriCorps volunteer.  Between now and August I will complete 300 hours of volunteer service primarily at the Boys and Girls Club of Bloomington, Gloabl Gifts, and the Interfaith Winter Shelter.  All of which are important causes-- kids, fair trade, homelessness and poverty.  

I am also an IU Tour Guide!

I saw HAIRat the IU Theater with Cassi.  
There was even a nude scene!

I went to Brown County with Shea and Kristen. 
I bought a wind chime and had the best pumpkin ice cream.
I was too distracted to take pictures, but Brown County is beautiful at this time of year.

Oh, and today I came home and noticed this... 

This seems like a totally normal view of my neighbor's house from my front porch

Pretty mundane right?

Notice anything out of the ordinary yet?


Yes this is a black pig just casually chained to their front porch. 
These neighbors never cease to surprise me. Last weekend for instance, they returned our initial neighborly gesture (delivering a homemade bunt cake) by putting a ceramic finger wrapped in aluminum foil in our mailbox as a thank you gift.